Grace Isn't Just a Name

I had a realization that I’d thought I’d share...

One of the most important times to give ourselves and others grace is during the most challenging times. I suppose that may seem fairly obvious but oh so easy to forget during those challenging times.

Today is one of those times for me. I have to take my mom to the doctor. It has filled me with anxiety, as do most of my visits with her. 

My mother has early onset dementia, and we are literally watching her become less and less herself. So, the anxiety comes from the unknown …what version of her will I see today?

Will it be the one that is kind and loving, or the version that's belligerent and says embarrassing things? That version doesn't bring out the best in me, truth be told.

Thanks to some amazing coaching from my friend and colleague, Meg, she helped me see something I hadn’t named yet… I haven't given myself the grace during this challenging time…grace to grieve that part of my mom that's no longer here.

Why am I sharing all of this? 

When we are in that space of grace, whether it's navigating a personal challenge or a professional one, the edges of that challenge often soften, as I’m finding. 

So today, I'm making a choice… To show up with grace for the mom who is still here and the one I'm losing. To give myself permission to feel all of it without judgment. To remember that grace doesn't require perfection.

Because here's what I’m learning in all of this: the moments that break us open are also the ones that teach us how to show up for ourselves and others. How to hold space for what is instead of focusing on what isn't. How to find beauty and resilience in the messy middle of those hard things.

So, here’s to grace...not as a solution, but as a way of being with what is.