Do you ever second-guess your choices?
When it comes to choice, do you ever feel powerless?
If you answered, “yes” to both or either question, please know you’re not alone!
I’ve second-guessed many of my choices only to realize that if I went with my gut and used my values as a guide, the second-guessing would have been non-existent.
I’ve caught myself saying, “I have no choice”. Telling myself that big lie led to feeling powerless and resentful. Not cool!
And you know what’s funny? Second-guessing and being powerless are choices.
I believe in the power of choice. But I gotta tell ya, after one of my morning rituals I’m looking at choice through a different lens.
A POWERFUL DOWNLOAD
“Choose your words, your actions and your direction wisely… for you are always in choice.” That was one of the messages I received during my morning intuitive reading.
We are always in choice, particularly when it comes to what we do or what we say. BUT...
What I’ve come to realize, while we DO always have choice, I’ve missed the distinction between choices for the greater good (including my own) and choices that can create a powerlessness (or a mess). I’ve not intentionally missed this; I just didn’t recognize its importance until I received the following during my reading…
“Choice can move mountains and it can cause wars. While you stand in choice, you must also be responsible for the choices you make.”
Yes! The choices we make can have a huge, positive impact! For example, making the choice to stop self-deprecation, making the choice to drink more water, or making the choice to not gossip.
On the flip side the choices we make can also create a mess. But here’s something to think about, that mess diminishes when we take responsibility for the choices we make. When we can say, “I’m sorry, my mistake.”
Any time I’ve stopped the blame game, the excuses, and actually taken responsibility for a choice I’ve made that went South, it’s been quite empowering and liberating. The worry and the guilt dissipated instead of hung around like an unwanted guest at a cocktail party.
“The wrong choice is the choice made for self-centered reasons and nothing more.”
For example, choices “made to spite another” or get back at someone for something they did or said. These are usually the choices we make out of anger, as a reaction. I’ve been guilty of this, or as my grandmother would say, “cutting off my nose to spite my face.” It’s in the moments of anger when the best choice we can make is to take a pause. To give ourselves the time we need to cool off and come at things from a more neutral place.
I know that any choices I've made out of anger have never turned out well. It usually comes down to me saying something that I later regret and creates more of a mess for me to clean up after the fact.
“We must consider our choices carefully. The choice to do nothing can be a good choice in the moment. However, if another person is in harm’s way” (and we have the power to do something), choosing to do nothing is a detriment.
There are times when choosing to do nothing has been the best choice for me. For example, choosing not to respond to someone’s insensitive comment has kept me out of a conversation that could have gotten messy. Choosing to do nothing on a Sunday afternoon instead of filling it full of activities has saved my energy when it’s been depleted.
That choosing to do nothing is quite different to “turning a blind eye” when someone is in harm’s way. I invite you to watch this short video to see what I mean.
HOW TO STOP SECOND-GUESSING & AVOID POWERLESSNESS
THE POWER OF CHOICE
When we make choices with good intentions as the backdrop, we give ourselves…
So much better than second-guessing or powerless, don’t you think?
As always, I welcome your thoughts, questions, and insights.
What makes you great at making choices?
Where do you struggle the most?
Here’s to the power of choice. Until next time, I'm sending you all much love & light...
About this blog
This is the place where I share my personal journey, insights, ideas, and a-ha moments helping me to mute my own inner critic. It is my hope you find what you need to mute your own.